Dinosaur Island (2014) Review

Sink this island

Despite a plethora of feathered reptiles, Dinosaur Island’s camp excitement is an interest killer. Borrowing a litany of classical sci-fi cliches from Conan Doyle and Jules Verne, this “lost world” piece needs an injection of enthusiasm before it can pull itself together, but said medication never comes.

Not to be confused with the 1994 direct-to-video dino skin flick of the same name (although that may be comical depending on the circumstances), Dinosaur Island is a briefly existing childhood cheapie with two kids warped into an unknown location for the sake of rushing the threadbare plot along. The feature mostly relies on chunky, long-winded exposition to propel itself forward. A few computer generated dinosaurs pop up to ease the miniscule lulls.

Certainly, the film aims young. Squashed bugs and “ewws!” are numerous. The softened survival drama ignores the peril these kids face alone in a prehistoric jungle. They’re well cared for because the writing says so.

Dinosaur Island has no morals or message to speak of. It’s blank entertainment.

Critical failures bring out Dinosaur Island’s contemptible lack of purpose. Lucas (Darius Williams) and Kate (Kate Rasmussen) learn nothing. The duo never expand as characters or learn to work together to overcome adversity. They exist to run away from danger, nothing more. Dinosaur Island has no morals or message to speak of. It’s blank entertainment. There is also an issue of borderline racist young natives, who, like the main cast, amount to nothing other than their stereotypes ripped from sometime around 1930.

A distinct lack of patience rips Dinosaur Island away before it can catch on. Ten minutes in and Lucas is already staring down predators. Such pacing is indicative of a film built for a generation weened on entertainment as something blasted at them from multiple screens. The sense of wonder and mystique which so commonly surrounds these extinct creatures is gone.

It is easy to poke Dinosaur Island for the apparent clumsiness. Kids won’t care, but there are better options in the same genre domain. Both of the Dwayne Johnson Journey movies offer comparable light thrills with grander technique. Beyond the refreshed science powering the colorfully feathered appearance of the island’s inhabitants, Dinosaur Island is a stumbling low budget Australian import. [xrr rating=2/5 label=Movie]

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